I am now less than two weeks away from my due date. My legs feel like tree trunks and the in-laws have arrived from Brazil- let the madness begin.
It’s been great having my in-laws here. I am constantly reminded not to assume or try to predict anything. For instance, my mother-in-law, Ruth (pronounced “Hoochie”- I’m not kidding) is kind of shy to touch my belly to feel the baby moving. That may not sound surprising but let me tell you about the first time I met her. Patrick and I started dating because he was helping me plan a trip with my sister to Brazil. I was going to be there alone for a few days and he graciously offered for me to stay with him and his family. Smart move on his part - within two weeks of our first dinner, I was on a plane with him to Brazil and he asked me if I wanted to officially be his girlfriend somewhere over Venezuela. At first I laughed, “Are you really asking me this?” but I couldn’t resist his charm and agreed. I realized that he hadn’t seen his family for a while, so I told him on the first day that he should drop me off to shop for Brazilian bikinis while he spends some time with his family.
I’ll never forget that first day. We had breakfast with the family- his mother spoke very limited English at the time so she just kept staring and smiling at me. Then, next thing I know I am with Patrick, my new “boyfriend” who I’ve been hanging out with for two weeks, his mother, Hoochie, and his cousin- all of us shopping for bikinis for me. Apparently, Hoochie loves to shop. And isn’t shy about expressing her opinion. At one point, she even came into the dressing room to check out the goods (I’m still not sure if she was checking out the bathing suits or me). I would never let my own mother into the dressing room but I felt at the moment that this was just one of those cultural things. (Or I was so incredibly jet-lagged I didn’t know what else to do). That shopping excursion was one of the first moments when I realized, “I’m going to marry this guy”. And officially have a Hoochie mama 
Now, nearly 4 years later, Hoochie still loves to shop and doesn’t hesitate to express her opinion. I’m learning that child rearing is very cultural. Hoochie was offended when I wouldn’t eat the non-pasteurized cheese she brought from Brazil, shocked that the pediatrician told us not to take the baby around young kids for the first thirty days, and amazed that we have special detergent for the baby’s clothes. We took a family trip to Babies R Us. Hoochie was insisting we buy sheets for the stroller, apparently a very popular, “must need” item in Brazil. Babies-R-Us doesn’t even sell them. I guess like everything in life, culture completely colors the way we go about things- especially how we raise our children.
Tags: multicultural kids
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